We were organizing my client’s catch-all room and came across her Costco surplus supplies laying on the floor. I suggested putting them in the hall closet. “There’s no room in there,” she said emphatically. I hear that a lot. Closets seem full, so things are left out or clutter-up other rooms. Often after a quick closet purge of items no longer needed or used, a client is surprised by an open shelf.
Sometimes our lives are like those closets. We randomly stuff them full. Pretty soon, we can’t stuff another thing in, and so things get left out. Sometimes important things. We can’t see that, with a little intentional thought, we can let go of the less important things and make space for what we truly value.
In my coach training we talk about creating “A Life That Fits.” Sometimes that means discovering your passions and strengths. Other times that means letting go of a negative perspective, or adding something like a new routine or system. Creating “A Life That Fits” is unique to every individual.
There is one component, however, that I believe is essential to every “Life that Fits.” It’s gratitude—the quality of being thankful. Think about it. What does gratitude do for you and those around you? Have you ever regretted or felt worse after being thankful? Has there ever been a time when you didn’t have at least one thing to be thankful for?
I recently sat at an event with people from three different families who were each grieving the loss of a child. As they shared with one another how they were coping with the upcoming holidays, I was profoundly struck by the fact that two of them mentioned giving thanks as a method of coping. Intentionally choosing to ponder and give thanks for the blessings in life isn’t removing their pain, but it is helping them cope.
In the article, A Serving of Gratitude May Save the Day by John Tierney (nytimes.com) he says that cultivating an "attitude of gratitude" has been linked to better health, sounder sleep, less anxiety and depression, higher long-term satisfaction with life and kinder behavior toward others. For something that's free and has no negative side effects, gratitude offers some amazing benefits!
Remember the commercial, "There's always room for Jello?" Even if you feel like your life is too full as it is, there's always room for gratitude. May I challenge you to add a daily dose beginning this Thanksgiving week?
If you’re having a hard time getting started, RealSimple.com has a list of 100 Things to be Thankful for This Year and LifeHack.org has 60 Things to be Thankful for in Life. If none of those seem to fit, you can always say what Mrs. King (my children’s Kindergarten teacher) says, “...and thank You, God, for all the bad things that didn’t happen.”
wise words
“Often people ask how I manage to be happy despite having no arms and no legs. The quick answer is that I have a choice. I can be angry about not having limbs, or I can be thankful that I have a purpose. I chose gratitude.”